Kevin and Caitlin’s Cross Country Travel Journal Part 2
Saturday May 27, 2006
- Today’s big stop was at the Mississippi River. We stopped at the usual tourist traps, selling postcards and local flair. After a quick shopping trip to an Irish store and seeing something called “Our Lady of the River” school, we took some pictures and took off.
- I ask Caitlin if cows in the Caribbean practice “moodoo”. She, surprisingly, does not throw me out of the car.
- We stayed in some place called Kearney in Nebraska. Why did we stay there? Because the hotel had free wireless internet -- which was out because of a wind storm.
- I inform Caitlin that our pet elephant, Samir, paints with his hoofs. This is called “hoof-arted”.

Sunday May 28, 2006
Ah the day I realized I’m retarded.
- 8AM. I get into the shower and Caitlin hears a yell of surprise. She comes running in to see what’s wrong and I say, “there’s water in the tub!” Now I know that sounds stupid. The thought process was that the tub looked empty and when I put my foot into what I thought was an empty tub I was surprised that there was a pool of water there.
- Last night I told my Mom that Caitlin finds it annoying when I put the hotel room card key into my wallet when I know I’m going to have to take it back out in two minutes. Then this morning I don’t put it in my wallet and what happens? Both of us forget our cards and lock ourselves out of the room, thus necessitating getting a third card.
- However the stupidity continued. I put 75 cents in a machine to get the day’s newspaper. Silly me I thought I had to press a button to get the door to open and retrieve my paper. Then it doesn’t work. I get mad and start shaking it. Caitlin, wonderful gal that she is, informs me that I pressed the coin return button and that I don’t need to press anything to open the door, I just open the door.
- People in passing cars wave at our one-eyed pet monkey. His name is Howard.
- I become amazed at the amount of cows in a nearby field.
Me: “Wow, look at all of the cows.”
Caitlin: “That’s a slaughterhouse.”
Me: “Oh… I’m not hungry anymore.”
- I come up with a brilliant idea for a dollar store type chain. Senor Discount. It’s for old Mexicans.
- We pass a sign for some place called “Points of Rocks”. Myself, Caitlin, and Howard all point at some rocks.
- I come up with the Wyoming song:
We’re in Wyoming.
We’re in Wyoming.
I don’t know what
Wyoming has.
We’re in Wyoming.
We’re in Wyoming.
We’ll probably only
Stop for gas.
- We pass a lot of horses with saddles on. I say, “it looks like a horse theme park. No, I mean lots of horses to ride, not lots of rides for horses.” I then proceed to draw a picture of two horses on a roller coaster.
- Caitlin starts to talk about “Stampy the Platypus”. I believe she has finally gone insane.
- Towns start appearing out of nowhere. It’s like the old Off Road video game where the closer you get stuff just, boing, pops up out of nowhere.
- While in the hotel room I get up to answer my cell phone. Which is currently without a charge, or minutes, in a bag in the car. Oh. The cell phone on TV has the same ring tone as mine.
- While talking to my Mom on Caitlin’s cell phone, my Mom informs me that sometimes after work the nurses have squirt gun fights with syringes full of saline.

Part 3 later…